Wednesday, November 13, 2013

How To Build Strong Relationships - 10 Tips

How To Build Strong Relationships - 10 Tips


Photo: How to build strong relationships
It is not a secret that any relationships face hard times and problems. It is better to be aware of the basics that will help to start building strong ties from the very beginning to feel comfortable with the partner.
1. Use relationships to teach you how to be whole within
Relationships aren’t about having another person complete you, but coming to the relationship whole and sharing your life interdependently. Learn to love the distances in relationship as much as the togetherness.
2. See your partner for who he or she really is
The romantic tragedy occurs when one partner attributes to the other the qualities the latter doesn't possess. When you realize that more often than not you don’t really know your partner, you begin to discover who they are and how they change and evolve.

3.Learn from each other
Be able to see the other as a mirror and learn from the reflection how you can be a better person. When you feel upset, don't blame your partner, remain awake to what has yet to be healed in yourself.

4. Get comfortable being alone
In order to accept that love can’t rescue you from being alone, learn to spend time being with yourself. By feeling safe and secure to be on your own within the framework of relationship, you will feel more complete, happy, and whole.

5. Look closely at why a fight may begin
Some couples remain in a vicious circle by fighting and then making up over and over again. This allows you to continue the romantic trance, creating drama and avoiding real intimacy. If you become aware of what you fear about intimacy, you’ll have a better sense of why you’re fighting—and likely will fight far less.
6. Own who you are
Own who you are. We generally grasp at romantic love because we’re yearning for something that is out of reach, something in another person that we don’t think we possess in ourselves. But then we discover that we didn’t get what we were looking for. True love is about loving yourself first. You can only get from another person what you’re willing to give yourself.
7. Don't be scared of ordinariness
After the fairy-dust start of a relationship ends, we discover ordinariness, and we often do everything we can to avoid it. The trick is to see that ordinariness can become the real “juice” of intimacy. Then everyday life with the partner becomes extraordinary.

8. Expand your heart
We all want to be happy, which also includes the desire to be close to someone. To create real intimacy, discover the spaciousness of your heart and bring awareness to what is good within you. It’s easier to find the good in your partner when you’re connected to the good in yourself.

9. Focus on giving love
Genuine love is first about giving. The unintentional outcome of loving others more deeply is that we are loved more deeply.

10. Let go of expectations
You may look to things such as romance and constant togetherness to fill a void in yourself. This will immediately cause suffering. If you unconsciously expect to receive love in certain ways to avoid giving that love to yourself, you will put your sense of security in someone else. Refer to your own resources: offer love, attention, and nurturance to yourself when you need it. Then you can let love come to you instead of putting expectations on what it should be like. 

12 Reasons Women Don't Date 'Nice Guys'

12 Reasons Women Don't Date 'Nice Guys'


photo - 12 Reasons Women Don't Date Nice Guys
If you are a guy reading this, you have probably noticed that, instead of opting for a nice and calm partner who would treat her right (you), the girl usually chooses a 'bad boy'. If you are a girl, then you probably are wondering why you are attracted to and end up with a man who treats you badly. We've tried to come up with sensible reasons why this happens, but you are very welcome to add some new insights on the matter in the comments!
1. Not real. Nice guys are too nice. No one can always be that nice unless they're a saint. They are busy being nice instead of being real and women instinctually don't trust that. Bad boys "keep it real." Nice guys don't want to upset the apple cart.
2. Respect. No one respects a doormat. Nice guys don't set boundaries or make any real demands. A bad boy doesn't let a woman walk all over him or control him. Women can't respect a man they can control. No respect equals no attraction.
3. Predictable. Most people lead boring, predictable lives, so they're attracted to people who are exciting and a bit unpredictable. Bad boys are always a challenge.Nice guys are never a challenge. Predictable plus no excitement plus no challenge.
4. Mother Nature. Women are designed to nurture. However, instead of doing this with children, they often end up doing it with bad boys. They think their love will save them. Nice guys rarely need to be saved.
5. Fixing. Nice guys don't usually need to be fixed. Bad boys usually do, so they become a project. Women think if they can "create" the perfect man, he will never leave them. Also, if they're busy fixing someone else, they don't have to look at what needs to be fixed in their own lives.
6. Genetic wars. Women are designed to procreate with the strongest possible genes. Bad boys are sending an unconscious message that they have great genes, so they're not afraid of losing the woman by misbehaving. Nice guys are sending a message that they don't think their genes are good enough, so they won't misbehave.
7. Fear of intimacy. If a woman is afraid of intimacy, she subconsciously knows she can avoid it with a bad boy, since she can never get close enough to him to have to go there. A nice guy will eventually want a commitment, and that's scary.
8. Low self-esteem: We don't feel comfortable with people who treat us better than we treat ourselves. If you don't think much of yourself, the bad boy is simply reinforcing your negative belief. A nice guy is treating you in a way you're not familiar with.
9. Sex. Women feel a nice guy won't be good in bed. They sometimes like to be manhandled and think a nice guy won't be able to take control and get the job done. A bad boy comes across as being able to deliver, even though that may not always be the case.
10. Hot. Have you ever seen a bad boy who wasn't hot? They probably wouldn't be able to get away with half the stuff they did if they didn't look so good. Meanwhile, when a woman describes someone as a nice guy, she means, "He's not hot."
11. Charm. Nice guys don't always know what to say and are sometimes at a loss for words. Bad boys can be very charming and know exactly what women want to hear. However, they eventually switch over to being selfish. By the time they reveal their true colors, the woman has fallen for them and has a hard time letting go.
12. Protection. Historically, men have protected women — physically and otherwise. Bad boys give the illusion of being able to protect women, while withnice guys, women aren't so sure. Life is about balance. Most men fall into either the bad boy or the nice guy category. The ideal man is neither, but walks that fine line between the two. Until men learn how to do this, more often than not, women will choose the bad boy, until they realize that his bad qualities outweigh his good ones.

The Secret To Getting Any Girl To Have Sex With You

The Secret To Getting Any Girl To Have Sex With You


photo
Getting to have sex with a girl you desire is a dream come true. You may want to date her or you may find her extremely sexually attractive.
Get these ten moves right, and she’ll be more than happy to have sex with you!
1. Let her see your great side:If you want to have sex with a girl, you definitely have to be good enough to get her attention. If she thinks you’re desirable and everything she wants in a great guy, half your work’s cut out for you already.
2. Let her know you’re interested in her: Talk to her, spend time with her, and let her catch you staring at her discreetly now and then. Make her wonder if you’re interested in her without revealing too much. If you ask her out without making her like you first, she’ll lose the excitement of the mysterious relationship. Make her wonder what’s on your mind and you’ll make her fall in love with you without even asking her out.
3. Get out of the friend zone: Unless you’re dating her already, the friend zone is a scary place to be. Friends don’t have sex with each other and they avoid getting sexually attracted to each other. Be her friend, but don’t be just another friend who’s got no sexual interest in her. Make it clear that you find her attractive and sexy. Tease her sexually, compliment her outfit with sexy remarks and talk dirty with her. Both of you may be friends, but let her feel the sexual tension when you’re around her.
4. Spend more time with her: If you want to have sex with a girl, the only time you can work your magic is by getting some alone time with her. You need to flirt sexually and make her feel comfortable to be with you. But you can’t do that when there are other friends around. Behave normally when there are other friends with her, but the second they walk away, say something like, “whew… now I get to spend some alone time with this sexy girl…” or something else that makes it clear that you find her attractive in a more-than-just-friends kind of way.
5. Go out with her: You don’t have to fix a date to take her out. Grab lunch together at work or help her run an errand now and then. By doing that, you’re already taking the place of her boyfriend in her mind. But always remember to keep the sexual excitement on a high. Or she’d just look at you as a friend.
6. Touch her and excite her: The touch is a very powerful way to send the right signals across without seeming desperate. Look for ways to touch her arm or clasp her hand at the opportune moment. The more you touch her delicately and sensually, the more sexually turned on she’d get.
7. Invite her to your place: Invite her to your pad, or get invited back to her place. You’ve built the sexual tension already. She knows you’re not just a friend, and she definitely knows you’re attracted to her already. By getting comfortable in each other’s places, it’s taking you one step closer to her bedroom and into her pants. After all, if you’re going to get a girl to have sex with you soon, you need to make her feel comfortable with you in each other’s private spaces.
8. Give her a few sneak peeks: So she thinks you’re a nice guy who’s attracted to her. But that’s really not enough. You need to arouse her and force her to take little glances at your sexy side. Look away from her and stretch casually when you have a hard on inside your jeans. Let her catch a sneak peek of your obliques and your rather low trousers when you’re changing your shirt at your place. Always look away when you’re flaunting your body to her. It gives her enough time to admire you sexually without the fear of getting caught. These moves will involuntarily make her get sexually attracted to you and desire you.
9. Watch a movie together: Go out on a date or stay back at home and watch a movie. A movie involves a few hours of quiet time where both of you sit really close to each other. This is where you can touch her ever so slightly with your arm or your foot. Do it the right way and be patient, the chemistry can be electrifying. If you want to seduce a girl, absentmindedly graze your arm against hers with the slightest of touches while sitting next to her. It’ll turn her on before you know it!
10. Arouse her the right way: If you want to know how to get a girl to have sex with you, you really need to remember that all the focus is on sexually exciting her and arousing her into making out with you. Never seem pushy, instead play it safe and slow instead of going too fast.
These ten tips on how to get a girl to have sex with you can help you do more than just kiss the girl you like or touch her breasts.